The Lord is always gentle to nudge us slowly and so he began with a conversation here, a word there. Then I happened upon 1 Peter 3:5-6. The passage was talking about wives, submission, reverence, outward adornment and the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit which is of great worth in God’s sight. It then goes on to say-
“For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful. They were submissive to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear. “
As I read these verses I thought of how Sara was the wife of one of the patriarchs in the Faith Hall of Fame (Heb11), how she endured so much and waited upon the Lord for answered prayer. She obeyed Abraham twice when he, in fear, claimed her as his sister, not his wife. Both times God protected her. I thought of how she could have given into fear with the uncertainty of the situation her husband’s decision had put her in. Yet God was with her, He saw her position and cared for her. If God is willing and able to protect Sara will He not also care for me?
As I read the last line of these verses I considered the “do what is right”- and realized that in the beginning of the passage it spoke of women who put their trust in God. In so doing it allowed the inward beauty of faith to reflect outwardly. That beauty was a reflection of the honor given to both God and their husbands. It is a beautiful thing to see a woman respond with unity and willingness to God and her husband. As I honor God with trust and then honor the authority over me; my husband glory is given to my Lord.
There is an analogy here, Christ willingly submitted and laid down his life for the will of his father. We don’t hear Jesus griping and complaining and striving to gain his own way, rather he chose to submit and in so doing to glorify the Father. In like manner we as wives have the choice to chose to submit and in so doing bring glory to our husbands and beauty to our lives.
When I consider that Christ is my role model for submission and I see how He chose to lay down his very life willingly I find myself needing to consider my heart attitude. I am challenged to consider what my heart attitude is as I approach my husband and my Lord. Is my attitude one of willing obedience or reluctant acceptance? Do I fight and throw a fit because I can’t have my way? The light of truth shines upon my heart - areas I thought I was doing so well in God in his gentleness illuminates my selfish, sinful attitudes. I begin to face my sin and the reality of my heart.
I have considered what often blocks my willingness to lay down my will for his and it is fear- the “what if’s?” or the “you don’t understand”- all fear related. Recently I have considered my motives when I start to balk at the leadership of my husband and more often than I like to admit I find that the root of my response is in fact either fear or the desire to be in control. Here God labels the motives of my heart. God knows that I, as a woman long to be in control, because I, in my heart trust myself more than Him or my husband, I want to protect myself and care for myself.
The sin of pride continues to beset my life- outwardly I say I need God yet in my heart of hearts all too often I think and act like I can take care of myself better than He can. Yet He reminds us as women that to do what is right is to honor and submit to my husband and not give into fear.
Am I willing to trust in the God who cared for Sara? Am I willing to trust in Him to direct and guide my husband as he leads our family? Am I willing to trust even as Sara did as her husband was passing her off as a sister rather than protecting her like a husband? Oh this is hard to say yes to.
This verse stood out, so much so that I wrote it on my mirror. Daily I am faced with the challenge and reminder of God’s word and daily I am caused to wrestle a bit more with my fear and my faith. I have by no means conquered this area but I am finding the wrestling good exercise for I desire to glorify God with my life. I desire to be a daughter of Sara- putting my hope in God and thereby reflecting His beauty. I desire to honor and respect my husband and allow God to lead our family through Him.
Perhaps you will join me in reflecting on what is going on within as you choose to respond with faith or fear to your God and your husband.
Wonderful, wonderful words. I so enjoy hearing your everyday thoughts as you wrestle with and process issues. We're really into that these days -- "wrestling and processing" the deeper things of the LORD. It's a sweet place to be since we know that we know that we know He holds us in His unchanging love.
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