Transitions, change and growing up

Verbs are action words. They require action and movement or state of being. Sometimes that is so very hard to move or change the state of being. It feels like life is presently filled with verbs. This is a season of being a "Gumby" as my dear husband would say- being flexible. Not always easy.

I love my family and children, maybe too much, as it is often hard to let go and allow less of them to be enough. To let go of the old ways and begin new ways of doing things. Recently I realized that there is a kind of handoff as parents. You start with no children, then you adapt to having children and the first ones adapt to sharing life with the ones who follow them. the later children have known nothing else so on the tail end of their childhood they will be required to adapt to a quieter house and one with less folks around and then the parents again adapt to the return of the quiet house.

Our oldest, at 20 remains at home, as he is putting himself through school and is "too poor" to move out. My next is soon to graduate and is beginning to test her wings. In the past few months she has begun to makeup for the lack of activity in the past few years. She has joined a few clubs, and now is involved in Venture Crew as well as considering a new body to worship in. I am thrilled by her zest for life and am pleased to see her pursuing her interests.

Our middle son claims that he will never live in the country- he wants action and activity to surround him- so he is the one often seeking rides and wanting to go, go , go. Age and lack of funds often keep him homebound but the desire to fly is there. And then there is the youngest- Sam. He has only ever known having everyone around. He likes his siblings, though he will ask his oldest brother when he is moving out so that he can have his room. He gets sad sometimes when all are away from the house, yet he is not a real pursuer of people, rather he enjoys them when they are around but also enjoys being alone. hmmm, maybe he is more like his parents than I realized??!

It is a seaon of change and adjustment. Slowly we step down the path before us. slowly i release my hold and allow a bit of distance so that the children can become adults. little things like acknowledging that the 20 yr old is a young man and with that come some freedoms. Acknowledging that he now may excuse himself from the table, no longer seeking permission as he did as a boy. Some things are nice like the semi adult conversations about life and seeking information and opinion that we would not have enganged in years ago.

They are all doing well, enjoying some of the growth. I am finding that if I take it one step at a time I too am enjoying the transtion. It just has to go slow so I am not disoriented by too fast of a pace. life- a verb to be lived!